sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
He kissed a someone with a penis
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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