I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
