I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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