remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
