I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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