Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize