Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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