You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
So vagazzling was a success
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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