he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
now i know why i became what i already was.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
