Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize