it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
