wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
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If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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