I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
