I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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