Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
