Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize