kristin has been a bad kristin
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
