I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
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