i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
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Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.