Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Randomize