i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
stop calling my apartment porn island.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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