I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
