Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
North Korea, Best Korea!
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
