The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
They are going to name an STD after you.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
