What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
