My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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