I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
