So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i dont even know how to be here
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize