Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
