She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
