I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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