I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Randomize
