Taylor Swift is so right about you.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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