i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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