Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I supernannyed him into submission
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize