Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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