idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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