OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
