He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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