I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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