No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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