He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
