You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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