I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Randomize