sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize
