Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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