I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Randomize
