what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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