please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
