how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
