I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Come share oat with me in your robe
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
